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Dear friend עמ"ש, 

How do you get ready for Rosh Hashana? 

Personally, I am not the woman who fills her freezer with loads of Yom Tov foods. I’ll cook and bake when we get closer. For now, the inner work of Elul is calling my attention. At least, I’m trying to turn my thoughts in that direction. I’m thinking about the past year, and what I will do differently in the year ahead.

Starting this newsletter has been incredibly meaningful! It definitely takes up a lot of space in my life, and it’s an important change for the upcoming year.

But real change is not just what we do on the outside. It’s what we do on the inside. So, on the inside, I’m trying to turn towards Hashem – and away from contradictions – with more strength and deeper commitment.

For so many women, this time of the year is filled with fear and anxiety. I believe that we could change that! We can do better for ourselves and our families.

That’s what this week’s podcast episode is all about. First, we explore what the Arizal teaches about the spiritual energy of Elul. Then, we look at 3 practical ways to change your relationship with Hashem, moving from fear and avoidance, to love and connection.

Our relationship with Hashem is foundational in our lives. If you can move forward here, even just a little bit, you will bring that upgrade into every relationship, and every situation.

I think that’s a pretty meaningful gift you can give yourself this year. What are your thoughts?

Wishing you all the best, always!

Love,

Shterna 

The podcast is ready for you to listen on our hotline, website, spotify, and 24six.

On our hotline: 718-307-1100 - option 8

💛Put into practice...

1. Learn. 

Every time you sit down to learn about Hashem – through Tanya or Shaar HaBitachon – you are turning on a little light. Those little lights add up. It’s like eating vitamins, or switching to a healthier diet. You may not feel an immediate, radical difference. But over time, it does something real to you. It nourishes you and strengthens you.

2. Start noticing your thoughts. 

Your thoughts are you speaking to yourself.

Start paying attention to what you are telling yourself in your mind. When you find yourself being a bully to yourself, or thinking about Hashem in way that makes you feel anxious, hit the pause button. Ask, is that true? Today, you are free to make new decisions about the old beliefs and recordings that your mind naturally plays.

3. Daven with your mind and heart, not just your lips.

Davening is not just a time to ask Hashem to hear us. It’s a time to ask ourselves to hear Hashem. It’s a time to absorb the truth we want to believe and live with. Pick one line or one paragraph to focus your attention on. When you say those words, don’t just move your lips. Sit with it. Slow down and think about what you are saying. Use the moment as an opportunity to absorb the reality of Hashem’s greatness – and also of His absolute, unconditional love for you.

Something to look forward to...

✨ Sparks of Clarity 

We're SO excited to share our brand-new 8-part podcast series ✨Sparks of Clarity✨! Each episode is built around a real-life challenge, with insight and tools to help you actually work through it. We got such great feedback, so we decided to advertise it. When your friends tell you about it, you'll be proud to know that you were here first! (Along with all the other things you're proud of lol)

🔥Tanya in Real Life! 

You've been getting emails on Thursday mornings with a short message about what we're learning in Tanya in Real Life, along with the link to join. Do you want to continue getting those emails?

If yes, just click here and let us know :) or reply to this email: TANYA! 

Starting in September, we will only send the Tanya invitations to you if you opt in, so make sure to let us know if you want them!

📍NEW TANYA GROUP FOR POST-SEMINARY GIRLS   

You probably know at least one person who said that learning Tanya changed their life. 

There are so many ways to learn the Tanya, but there’s nothing like a small group where the conversations are real, and deep connections are developed.

That’s why we are so excited to announce a new shiur that’s starting THIS WEEK with Chayale Ginsberg. Chayale is a warm, engaging teacher with a personal style that invites interactive discussion in a friendly atmosphere.

This is a really wonderful opportunity for any post-seminary girl, so please think about who you want to tell – and let them know the details :)

The shiur is on Monday nights in Boro Park, in the neighborhood of 18th Avenue & 59th Street. For more information, call or text Chayale: 917-628-5344

💌Now it's your turn!

Last week, I asked you to reply and share your thoughts, and WOW, did you deliver! 

I am so moved by how many of you wrote back. Reading your message felt like sitting across from a friend. Together, you told me that this newsletter is "landing" not just in your "inbox," but in your heart! THANK YOU! 💖

Please continue to share your thoughts! And when you do, please let me know if I can post your message in this "community space" 📬

Looking forward to hearing your feedback and your own sparks of clarity :)

📩 From our inbox...

Here are some SPARKS of CONNECTION from women in our community this week:

FACTS and PERCEPTIONS

From Fraida in Monsey

I loved that little snippet about the two different parts to every story, and how a big part of our story is really our own understanding and ideas. 

Question: According to your definition of facts, they are mostly visible. But it seems like there are so many facts that are not visible. For example, if I use plain white paper plates to serve at a sheva brochos, it is for sure  "socially off" or not the standard. That is a fact. Everyone would agree. So what's the perception about it?

NOTE from Shterna: Fraida, thanks for your question! The Inner Story free course is coming up soon -- and you'll get a lot more clarity about this topic. 

Also, here's one important note: When a lot of people have the same opinion, that opinion feels like a fact. But it's still just an opinion. It's a fact that many people share the same idea... But the idea itself is not a fact. How does that land for you?

Loving Tanya in Real Life

From Dassy in Williamsburg

The Tanya series has been a game-changer for me! I just started learning, and I can’t get enough. The funny thing is, I have a friend who is Lubavitch (we see each other at an exercise class and we schmooze,) and she can’t relate to my excitement about the Tanya. I don’t think it’s because she knows it already. I wonder if it’s because she learned it as a teenager and I’m learning it as an adult. Either way, I’m so grateful to have found this treasure! Thank you for making it available! 

Please the “SHECHINA” (Hashem) and not the “SH’CHAYNA” (neighbor)!

From Rivky in Boro Park

What a breath of honesty this newsletter is! Thank you!

Many years ago, I learned a one-liner that has really helped me stay connected to my own values and not get swept into what others think or say. 

"I have to please the שכינה and not the שכינה!" (Editor’s note: The word “Shechina” means Hashem’s presence. But the same letter with different vowels has a completely different meaning – it means “neighbor.”)

I've used this walking down my block, passing a group of neighbors who looked me up and down, or before entering a simcha, or a job. I even use it in my own house when different people came or went. 

Any time the feeling of worthlessness niggles me, as I start comparing myself to others’ expectations, I ask myself: "Is Hashem pleased with what I'm doing or saying?" If I can answer “yes,” then I feel good, whole and complete. If not, then I stop what I am doing or saying. Not to impress other people, but because I want to do what Hashem wants. 

Are you spying on me? 

From Malky in Lakewood

I absolutely love these Sparks of Clarity! It's so spot on and applicable. It makes me wonder if you have a spy in my life....

I love the positivity of your ideas, and it is so full of truth. Now, we just need to tap into it :) 

Thank you, thank you!

If you read all the way until the end, please hit reply and let us know!

And share your thoughts :)

It takes a minute and means a lot!

Here's to our continued learning and growing together! 💕

Love,

Shterna

Energized Living